In the scramble to decide what to perform for our first sharing with the cohort, we chose to return to the mirror exercise. This had been the most resonant and evocative part of our rehearsals to date. The shapes and illusions we created in the mirror, often erotic and sometimes suggestive of sexual poses, seemed to “mirror” the illusions of a night out. Just as we set out hoping for a transgressive or unforgettable experience, the night out is often an illusory fantasy, reflecting back more about our internal state of mind than any genuine utopian escape. The combination of mirrors, our bodies, and an electronic track you might hear in a club highlighted this paradox well.

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We selected the track “Azrael” somewhat arbitrarily. It was a lyricless song Ariana often listened to and it evoked the underground club atmosphere without being overly opinionated. Its neutrality provided a strong backdrop to the sequence.

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Performing the piece for our classmates was both exposing and vulnerable. Many of us had never moved our bodies in this way in front of the group, and each of us experienced it differently. We felt liberated, self-conscious, critical, connected, numb, bold. All feelings that mirrored the complexity of a night out.

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The audience’s responses were helpful in our understanding of the piece. Some were impressed and others felt excluded (“I wanted to join in and couldn’t”). Several reflected on themes of narcissism and voyeurism. Some were even unsettled by watching us, uncomfortable with seeing themselves watching us in the mirrors. Unexpectedly, the piece spotlighted not only our performance but also the audience’s awareness of themselves as watchers.

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This encounter led us deeper into our interest in the dynamics of looking and being looked at, the pleasures and discomforts of spectatorship, and how these connect the heightened attention of a night out. In response, we began reading George Rodosthenous’s Theatre as Voyeurism: The Pleasures of Watching. The text reframes voyeurism as a mutually pleasurable exchange that can be productive rather than shameful. It argues that theatre has always involved looking, with both performers and spectators complicit in creating its erotic and aesthetic qualities.

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These ideas encouraged us to explore mirrors and erotic imagery as vehicles for staging erotic voyeurism itself.